My Top 10 Movies Of All Time

There's been a lot of heavy stuff the last few days but I am committed to moving on from the secrets in my past and returning to the pleasantly light hearted stuff you have all come to love from me.


One of my favorite things to do is quote my favorite movies.  I am HUGE on making people laugh with a quote or an impersonation or to find that deeper connection by sharing my favorite movies with people and finding out they also like that movie!  I wanted to share my top ten movies in hopes that maybe one of MY favorite movies resonated with you and maybe you'll get a deeper insight into who I am based on my favorites. Let's dig in!

10. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home (1986)

You know I couldn't have a top 10 list without at least ONE Star Trek movie!! What kind of Trekkie do you take me for! The problem with Star Trek movies is that unless you're a serious Trekkie or you grew up on them, these older 80s movies don't have much attachment to most people, Sandman included.  They're cheesy.  You know all the jokes and they make sense to you but they don't resonate with you unless you grew up in the Trekkie fandom.  This one was the FIRST Star Trek movie that I saw in theaters!  My grandmother (the OG Trekkie) took me to see this when I was 3 years old.  And I remember being MESMERIZED, not just by the whales but by the performances of the whole ToS crew.  This is where I fell in love with Bones, Spock, and Kirk.  It's where I understood how progressive Starfleet could be with Uhura at the helm.  This movie, to me, represents everything that is right about the Star Trek Universe.  And it's amazing comfort food for my brain when I'm laid up on the couch, sick.

 

9. Quarantine (2008)

But of course!  A horror movie too.  Jennifer Carpenter was genetically engineered for horror.  She was mind blowing in "The Exorcism of Emily Rose" (which is definitely in my top 20 movies!).  Those screams in the barn?  All her.  Then she did "Quarantine" and her scream at the end STILL sends shivers down my spine even though I have seen it a million times before.  And as Debra Morgan on "Dexter," she KILLED it.  The reason I picked "Quarantine" and not "Emily Rose" was not because one had stronger performances than the other.  They are BOTH incredibly well acted.  There are so many strong performances.  The reason I picked "Quarantine" instead of "Emily Rose" is that even after hundreds and hundreds of viewings, "Quarantine" still has the ability to scare the shit out of me.  I get lost in the action and BOOM! Scary thing! ACK!  The beginning is amazing at being boring but also being an INTERESTING boring, and once the action kicks up, it's a non-stop roller coaster that you can't get off for the rest of the movie.  And for that, it gets a place on my list.

 

8. Last Action Hero (1993)

This movie is so stupid.  If you haven't seen it, the basic premise is that this kid is obsessed with "Jack Slater" (Arnold Schwartzenegger) movies so this old projectionist gives him a magic ticket from Houdini that puts him in the movie.  Only, the bad guy gets a hold of the ticket while he's IN the movie and the kid needs Jack Slater to hop out into the real world to stop the bad guy from fucking up real life NYC.  They win, in case you were wondering.  Which you were not.  Because you are smart and this movie is formulaic.  So why is this stupid movie so high up on my list?!  Above STAR TREK?!  Dude... it's FUN.  It's the Arnold Schwartzenegger you always wished he made.  He's PG, he's got a cinephile kid for a sidekick, there's a BOATLOAD of action... The "Leo the Fart" scene was probably one of my favorites, as was the Premier scene where Jack Slater runs into Arnold Schwartzenegger while trying to catch the bad guy.  It's FUN.  It's a parody of a parody, it's good clean family fun, and it's exactly how you think action movies should be.

7. Gone in 60 Seconds (2000)

I'm KIND of an amateur gear head with a massive lady boner for classic American muscle cars.  I learned to drive in a teal blue 1967 Ford Mustang.  No joke.  My HS Sweetheart and his dad were fixing up the Mustang and I got to learn how to drive on it.  Power Steering is a must for me.  I know that now.

I also have a pretty big lady boner for Nick Cage and Angelina Jolie.  I have seen almost all of their movies.  "Gone in 60 Seconds" is an amazing time.  Now, I've never boosted cars (I had a friend in college who went to jail for Grand Theft Auto but by the time I met him, he was reforming his life), but watching them boost cars got my adrenaline pumping.  The only drag is that the 11th Doctor is the bad guy.  I have a hard time with that now that I know.  I mean, it doesn't make my lady boner for the cars, Nick Cage or Angelina Jolie go down any... but it's kind of fun.  Raymond Calitri is a pretty good Doctor Who character!

6. The Story of Us (1999)

I hear what you're thinking.  "Um... what?"  This movie garnered almost no press, bombed at the box office, and basically went straight to DVD.  The tagline of this Rob Reiner movie is "Can a marriage survive 15 years of marriage?"  It's a chick flick.  Even though Bruce Willis and Michelle Pfiffer are the main characters, this one is full chick flick.  In so many words, Michelle Pfiffer and Bruce Willis are a married couple who spend a summer contemplating divorce.  Spoiler Alert: They stay together.  It's formulaic too.  But what I LOVED about this movie is how brutally honest and true it is about relationships.  The reason I don't like most Chick Flicks is because they only cover the courting part of a relationship.  These completely illogical pairings happen and everyone lives happily ever after.  But what REALLY happens? In "The Story of Us" you get to see what really happens 15 years down the line.  The Montage at the end always makes me cry.  It's happy, sad, blissful, funny, and deeply saddening.  I saw this in the 7th grade at my mom's friend's house.  And I was moved.  I started praying every day for a relationship like theirs.  And I am happy to report that I found it.  I found the love they talk about in chick flicks.  Even this one.

5. Demolition Man (1993)

If you're going to spend my whole list wondering why I like shitty movies you're going to be suffering for a while.  I can't explain it.  I just love kitchy, tacky movies.  This one has the basic premise that in 1996, Sylvester Stallone (The Demolition Man) blows up a building to stop mega criminal Simon Phoenix (Wesley Snipes) only to find out he killed a bunch of innocents and is now being cryogenically frozen.  Only... in 2032, he's thawed out by the San Angeles Police Department who need an old fashioned cop to chase down a super enhanced and mega criminal like Simon Phoenix.  It also has Sandra Bullock pulling off better comedy than she ever did in "Miss Congeniality."  The highlight of this movie - other than all the blowing up - is Denis Leary's performance as Edgar Friendly.  What a real character and an honest portrayal.  Denis Leary has some serious acting chops and this movie lets him really show you that he is a good actor. The movie is full of quotables, ranging from "ENHANCE YOUR CALM, JOHN SPARTAN" to "He doesn't know how to use the three seashells!" Even the scene where the two San Angeles cops are singing jingles in the car cracks me up to no end.  It's action packed, full of comedy, kind of science fiction-y... much like how "Last Action Hero" is the movie you wished Arnold Schwartzenegger made, "Demolition Man" is the movie you wish Sylvester Stallone had made.  It's just fun!

4. Paranormal Activity 2 (2010)

The original was freaky.  This one stepped up the game.  Then Oren Peli opted to finance instead of make the next like 40 movies, which were all in varying degrees of crappiness.  Basic premise to this one is house is haunted by a demon that wants to eat the baby... or something.  Yes.  That is all there is to the premise.  But what makes this movie one of my favorites are the numerous scenes that, no matter how many times I see it, still manage to startle me and freak me out.  The last one lacked the spontaneity of the second one.  It was easy to figure out that there was a headache inducing hum before every event.  But in this one, it gets DEADLY SILENT.  And it delivers on the creeps.  Plus, if you're not pissed off when the demon goes after the dog, you have no soul.  I enjoy watching this movie when I'm sick because it's good fluff for the brain.

3. Idiocracy (2006)

This movie should be mandatory viewing for ALL teenagers.  I had honestly never seen this movie until Sandman made me watch it (it's one of his favorites) and now that I've seen it, I LOVE IT. Basic premise is that the world's most average guy and a prostitute are put into hibernation in our time for one year but wake up in a world populated by the dumbest people, 500 years later.  It talks about genetics, natural selection, gives a dystopic view of where our country is heading if we stay on the current trajectory, and the quotables!!!! OMG the quotables!!  "But it's got electrolytes. It's what plants want."  "I like money."  "I'm pregnant again!" "How did THAT HAPPEN!" "WOO! I'M GOING TO FUCK ALL OF YOU!!" President Comacho is a great caricature of basically all politicians ever.  It's hilarious... and also incredibly sad.  But definitely MANDATORY viewing.

2. The Fifth Element (1997)

I'm going to assume that most of you have seen it and that you know the basic premise, because the only thing I can say about it is this:  In a dystopic future, Bruce Willis has to save the world.  Why do I love this movie?  The quotables are definitely amazing.  When asked for my ID, I will normally respond with "Leeloo Dallas MultiPass" and I have been known to walk by the washing machine and say "Auto-wash."  More than that, it's INCREDIBLE to see a female lead as strong and powerful as Mila Jovovich's "LeeLoo."  She's such a strong model for young girls looking for an ass kicking female while not being too over the top.  Bruce Willis is able to blend humor with all of the action and allow you to fondly think of John McClane while still being able to be Korben Dallas.  And the mom.  The mom is HYSTERICAL.  "The president is an IDIOT. You don't sound like an IDIOT!"

1. Labyrinth (1989)

This is easily my favorite movie of all time.  No contest.  The movie came out when I was 4 years old and I was CAPTIVATED by the story and the performances, not just of the Jim Henson Company but those of David Bowie (who was selected by Jim Henson for his androgynous sexual energy) and Jennifer Connelly, who does fantastic as the spoiled brat who has to figure her shit out to beat the Goblin King and save her baby brother.  The visuals are stunning.  The Jim Henson Company really got heavy into the puppets, costumes, makeup, and sets to create this Modern Day fairy tale.  On a personal level, I first saw this movie at a time in my life where I was very small and having a lot of really scary nightmares.  This movie became comfort food for my brain because being lost in the labyrinth helped me process the complex feelings and emotions I was experiencing while my Bipolar Disorder was starting to set in.  To this day, I will still dream of Jareth and the labyrinth when I'm overly stressed out.  For most of my adult life, I wanted to name a boy child Jareth (Well... Jarod.  I thought his name was Jarod until I was 26 and I googled the movie for trivia) because of how much this movie has impacted me.

But what makes it especially meaningful is the line, "You have no power over me."  The whole phrase is "Through dangers untold and hardships unnumbered I have fought my way here to the castle beyond the Goblin City to take back the child you have stolen, for my will is as strong as yours and my kingdom as great. You have no power over me."  In the movie, the girl can't ever remember the final line until she's face to face with the Goblin King.  She looks down and says "ugh I can never remember that line."  Then she looks up, cocks her head to the side, and says, "You have no power over me."  The bell tolls and everything is put back to normal.  In EMDR therapy, I was going through the clicks and pushing through a memory... and when I started coming down, she said, "What do you feel."  I looked up, cocked my head to the side and said, "You have no power over me."  She smiled broadly.

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I know this was a list of just 10, but I couldn't help but add a couple of honorable mentions.  The reason they're not on the official list is personal, but I wanted to talk about them anyway.

 

 

Honorable Mention 1: Poltergeist (1982)

"They're HEEEERRRRREEE" is probably the creepiest line in the history of horror.  "This house is CLEAN" is definitely the line from this movie that I use the most.  This movie wins a spot as one of my favorite movies of all time because it's a little bit camp, a little bit mind fuck, and a whole lot of excellent acting on behalf of Craig T. Nelson.  For a longer explanation, please visit THIS BLOG that I wrote back in 2011 about my favorite horror movies of all time.

Honorable Mention 2: A League of Their Own (1992)

When I was growing up, my mom was VERY careful about making sure I only watched portrayals of strong women.  And example of this is that I wasn't allowed to watch "Power Rangers" because the women Power Rangers always needed male help.  I watched Power Rangers at my (chosen) brother's house.  Subsequently, I missed out on a lot of 80's kids classics.  I joke that I grew up on a Hippie Commune and that the 80s didn't happen for me.  In that respect, Sandman and I have a simpatico because he lived in Soviet Russia until 1990 and thus missed all of the 80s as well.

Being raised by a 3rd Wave Feminist robbed me of a lot of things but when "A League of Their Own" came out, I was not only encouraged to watch it but it was almost mandatory viewing.  My mom wanted me to know that girls in the times of "I Love Lucy" and "Bewitched" were playing professional baseball and shattering the glass ceilings.  Here were beautiful women being strong, empowered, and challenging the deep divide that existed between men and women in the 1940s.  I wrote the Baseball Hall of Fame and asked to write to a real player in the AAGPBL.  She and I corresponded for a year before I forgot to write her back.  Her story was amazing.  What a strong woman.  My mother was so happy that I was taking it all in, and then racing outside to go play ball with the other kids in the neighborhood - a space where race didn't matter, gender didn't matter, and being poor didn't matter (because we were all poor).  This movie reminds me that the fight will never really be over.  Girls will always be the fairer sex.  But we can still play some ball.

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I hope that this list has helped you maybe find a new movie or to get to know me a little better.  Tell me in the comments - What's YOUR favorite movie??

My Top 10 Books

I'm a voracious reader.  I'm usually in the middle of three or four books on various platforms (iPad, Audio Book, paper copy).  I read books from all genres but my weaknesses are Horror, Science Fiction, and Self-Help.  I will read just about anything that grabs my interest though, from Jodi Picoult and J. K. Rowling to Stephen King and Neil Gaiman.  I generally gravitate towards 20th century American literature, and have a special place in my heart for the science fiction of the 50s, 60s, and 70s.  I tend to gravitate most towards authors who write in a Stream of Consciousness because that's how I think (and write).

Here are my Top 10 Books of all time (and note that all of the titles correspond to the book's Amazon page for easy navigation and purchasing):

10. "Pet Semetary" by Stephen King

courtesy Wikipedia

This book was easily the first book I read multiple times.  I was bored one day on the summer between 5th and 6th grade, so I raided my mom's bookcase for something to read, and found "Pet Semetary."  I already knew the movie so I was intrigued by the book.  And what a wild ride!  This was the book where I fell in love with Stephen King.  I've read a lot of his books... but this was the one that opened the door to horror novels for me. Fun fact, in the 7th grade, we were told to do a book report on a book of our choosing.  I chose this book.  My teacher didn't believe I could have read the book on my own, so he called my mom about it.  She not only confirmed that I had read it but informed him that this book report was my third time reading it.  I got an A on the book report.

9. "Madness: A Bipolar Life" by Marya Hornbacher

Ignoring the fact that in 2009, I was emailing with Marya Honbacher about me becoming a writer... The important part to note is that this book is FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC for explaining the Bipolar mind.  It's a memoir.  Marya Hornbacher has Rapid Cycling Bipolar I disorder (probably with psychotic features, like me, but she never mentioned that) and she wrote this book to tell her story of battling Bipolar Disorder.  Its a WILD rollercoaster and so painfully accurate that reading the book launches me into a manic episode.  I've only read it twice for that exact reason.  But I highly recommend the book to anyone who wants to know the reality of living with Bipolar Disorder.  Some people have it easier than me and Marya... but she and I had a really rough road.  It's an important story to tell and I'm glad she did it.

8. "Flowers for Algernon" by Daniel Keyes

This book was required reading for a lot of adults that I know, but not for me, for some odd and unknown reason.  I read this one when I was cruising through an list of 20th Century America's Greatest Books.  This one makes my list because of how much it moved me.  It's a little bit science fiction, a little bit drama, and a whole lot of heart-strings pulling.  The end was so amazing that I ended up re-reading this book another time only to find that it just pulled the heart strings even harder when you know what's coming.  This is one book I plan to read to my own children, or give them to read themselves.

7. "The Committed Marriage" by Rebbetzen Esther Jungris

There's a huge subtitle here ("A Guide to Finding a Soul Mate and Building a Relationship Through Timeless Biblical Wisdom") but in the interest of saving time, we'll just call it "The Committed Marriage."  This is a Jewish self-help book.  I won't lie.  But it is AMAZING.  It gives you tools that help you enjoy a more fulfilling relationship without being overly preachy or Bible-y.  I have read this book several times and I always learn something new from it.  Now that I am married to my bashert and we are reading Jewish books on our path towards observance, this is my bedside book once again.  I have given and recommended the book to people of all faiths (and a few with no faith) without worrying that the book would be too Jewish or too Bible-y.  It's real wisdom from a Rebbetzen (the wife of a Rabbi, commonly accepted in Jewish circles as being as much an expert on Jewish law as her husband) on how to make your marriage work for you, instead of working for your marriage.  She also wrote "The Committed Life" which was a good read when I was single but not as applicable to my life now as "The Committed Marriage."

6. "The Time Traveler's Wife" by Audrey Niffenegger

Here's the thing about this book:  If you are the kind of person who gets lost in a book, whose imagination runs wild with the author, this one will pull your stomach and suck YOU into a new time and place.  When I first read this book, I was working in Real Estate and I carried the book with me on my cigarette breaks.  It took me about 2 weeks to finish.  And when it did, I cried.  The next time I read this book was by Audio Book while working at my last job.  Yet again, it pulled at my stomach and POP!  I was in another time and place.  It's well-written, gripping, and a journey.  The movie was OKAY... but that's only because it's hard to condense a book like this one into a 90 minute movie.  It did it's best.  But don't skip this book just because you saw the movie!  This one is worth the read.

5. "American Gods" by Neil Gaiman

What a mind-blowing book!  No seriously.  I have been addicted to Neil Gaiman graphic novels since I was a teenager but I didn't know he wrote any books until Sandman told me of HIS favorite books (one of which is "Neverwhere").  So of course I raced to his bookshelf and started consuming his books.  I never did finish "Neverwhere" but I almost absorbed "American Gods" by osmosis.  I literally could not put it down.  I carried a paperback, listened to it on Audible while ironing or doing dishes, I carried the book around with me everywhere I went until I was done.  And WHOA what a book.  Neil Gaiman (who I met once at a book signing!!) is an author like none other.  To say he is an inspiration is the understatement of the year.  If for no other reason... You need to read this book for the prostitute whose vagina eats the client.  IF FOR NO OTHER REASON!  Man swallowing vaginas are so fucking awesome.  You're WELCOME.

4. "Toward a Meaningful Life: The Wisdom of the Rebbe Menachem Mendel Schneerson" by Simon Jacobs

This book is quickly becoming one of Sandman's favorite books of all time.  He's been devouring this book for a couple of weeks now to find out exactly why I'm such a huge fan of the 8th Lubavitcher Rebbe, Menachem Mendel Schneerson.  The man was incredibly wise and this book is full of useful tidbits on how to live a more meaningful life.  It's not overly Jew-y and it's not preachy.  It merely addresses modern problems with the timeless wisdom of the Chabad Lubavitch movement (a movement that we BELIEVE was helped in founding by members of Sandman's family in Babrusk, Belarus).  My husband is secular so for a book of religious wisdom to grab him the way this book has, it really speaks volumes to the contents.  I have read this book and referenced this book several times since it came into my possession almost 6 or 7 years ago.  It's a great book to motivate you.

 

3. "Fahrenheit 451" by Ray Bradbury

When I see this book on the shelf, and I hold it, I am transported back to those first moments of reading it.  The feeling that at any moment, the Firemen are going to come and burn my book.  It sucks you into the world so fast that you feel part of the book from the beginning.  And it is a testament to our times.  Before he passed, Ray Bradbury went on record as saying that his wife and he were walking their dog around the neighborhood when they spotted a young couple, on their smart phones while walking their dog.  He noted that the girl tripped off of the curb and went right back to her phone.  He commented that he looked at his wife and said, "If that's not 'Fahrenheit 451', I don't know what is."  It wasn't a comment on censorship or McCarthyism, despite what your English teacher told you.  It was a comment on how the written word is slowly being replaced with electronics.  (Bradbury argued that exact interpretation at UCLA and stormed off stage when a student insisted he was wrong)  So prove Bradbury and the book wrong.  Read it!

2. "Forrest Gump" by Winston Groom

This book.... oh this book.  This book is a book of my heart.  It's a fast read.  It only took my husband 4 hours to read this book.  The movie hit a lot of the important points but it also missed a lot of the details.  This book, along with "Gump & Co" are the two books that I read and re-read and re-read and read again.  Being lost in Forrest Gump's world helped me stay sane in my own.

 

1. "On the Road" by Jack Kerouac

My all time favorite book comes in several formats.  You can read the original scroll, the original print copy, the revised print copy, the revised roll.  Still, the story stays the same.  It's a beatnik road trip that goes sideways.  But this book soothes my brain.  I am entirely convinced that Kerouac was an undiagnosed Bipolar because the only people who can make heads or tails of this book (so far as my limited sample size suggests) are people with Bipolar brains.  People with non-Bipolar brains just hate this book.  Usually with an intense passion.  But I love this book.  It is my all time favorite book.  It sits on my brain like warm caramel.  It just fills the spaces with warm goo.  Of all the books I have read, none have impacted me as much as this book...

When Sal is ready to settle down and move on with his life, his buddy Dean says to him, "I'll tell you, Sal, straight, no matter where I live, my trunk's always sticking out from under the bed, I'm ready to leave or get thrown out.  I've decided to leave everything out of my hands. YOU'VE seen me try and break my ass to make it and YOU know that it doesn't matter and we know time - how to slow it up and walk and dig and just old-fashioned spade kicks, what other kicks are there?  WE know."
That is this book summed up for me.

Honorable Mention:  "Stranger in a Strange Land"
by Robert A. Heinlein

My grandmother is a huge fan of science fiction of the 60s but we have such diametrically opposing viewpoints on what is and is not good reading material so naturally I didn't take her seriously when se suggested this book.  I WAS SO FUCKING WRONG.  Once I finally started dipping into the 60s Sci Fi, this book naturally came up on lists of the best Sci Fi of all time.  And with good reason.  This book fucked my brain from page one.  The ending made me angry, happy, sad, and so much more.  This book nestles close to my heart just because of how much I enjoyed reading it.  If you can forgive the Jesus analogy, you'll find a really captivating piece of literature.

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I hope you all have enjoyed my top 10 books.  Tell me in the comments what your favorite book is!  I'd love to read it!!

To the Person With a Chronic Illness Who Doesn't Feel Strong Right Now

This came across my Facebook feed.  I felt it needed to be preserved and shared as widely as it could go:

To the Person With a Chronic Illness Who Doesn't Feel Strong Right Now 

By Anna Evenosky

Dear _______,

I understand times are hard right now. In fact, it might feel as if your world is coming down on you. You feel as if you’­re stuck in a storm, and no matter where you go or what you do, all your problems will still be there pouring down on you. You feel helpless; you don’t think there is any shot of you seeing a rainbow when the storm is over. In fact, you don’t believe the storm will ever blow over. ­Whether your condition is taking a turn for the worse, you received a life-altering diagnosis or you received bad news that leaves you thinking your life is seemingly falling apart right in front of your eyes — please reconsider what you’re thinking and begin questioning if these are “realistic” thoughts.
So often when life throws us a bump in the road, we get wrapped up in those feelings that can be debilitating to our well-being. We begin to have unrealistic thoughts that ultimately lead us into a downward spiral. Life isn’t always fair, and dealing with chronic illnesses can sometimes create the perfect storm.

What you’re feeling is overwhelming to say the least, and I’m sure you don’t need me telling you that to realize this. Do me a favor, and think back to a time when you felt equally as bad, or think of a time when your conscience whispered to you, “I don’t know how to handle this. I have never been so upset and at such a loss before.” Now look where you are today. You made it out, didn’t you? Nobody said it was easy back when you had to maneuver your way out of that storm, but you did it. You are a stronger person than before, and the skills and drive to feel better still lie within you.

Believe it or not, I’m here to tell you that you can do it all over again. Sometimes as much as you want to have an explanation to answer the question, “Why me?” you must stop wasting your time. You will never know the answer to that question, and life is way too short to be stumped on the unknown. Don’t waste another precious second of this beautiful life we live in.

Please do yourself this favor. Believe in yourself and the strength you have inside of you. Whatever life has thrown in your direction, you are strong enough to beat it. I know it gets tiring to say the least, and some days you say you don’t want to fight anymore and that you want to give up. You have been fighting too long to give up now. It’s like running a 5K but giving up at the last half-mile. It may take time to get through everything that has left you at a loss, but it’ll be worth the fight. That fight that is going to give you the hopeful, happy and resilient piece of you that you have been missing. Dismiss that “Why me?” question. Instead, tell yourself, “Yes me” — this my life, and I am strong enough to live it.

Sincerely,Someone who knows exactly what you’re going through